Seriously Employed

So, approximately 6 short weeks ago I was quite uncertain about my life, well guess what dear readers (hmm, well still hoping for some) I got myself a j-o-b. Yup, I actually worked 5 hours yesterday and will get a paycheck to prove it. So, after contemplating my options, plus my wants and my "dreams" I asked at a small shop in town if they needed part-time help. So, yes it is retail, but at least it is "mom and pop" retail.  And, I can't beat the hours 9-2 two days a week. 10 hours a week. Perfect. I am not really messing with my kids life (unless they have off school one of those days then they will just have a wing it for 5 hours without me- plus they can walk down and visit me)

One of those crazy "dreams" would be to open a small shop someday in a small town (like the one I am currently residing in). So I have lots of ideas about what I want in this shop that I have already named - gratitude - with a daisy dotting the i - I want wine, coffee, music, yarn, books, artistry, etc but I figure I should really see what it's like to work in a small shop in a small town, so here we go. Hoping I don't actually want to check this one off my list in 3 months. So I was quite proud of myself for sending two faxes, pricing out chocolate milk flavored straws, arranging earings in a display case and ringing up 8 customers without jamming the register! I was still home for some puppy time before the kids got off the bus and we made it through homework, dance classes and dinner and I only needed one 20 minute nap in the midst of all that jazz (pun intended). This working thing is exhausting, apparently my body was not quite ready to enter the very part-time work force. Maybe Friday will be better? At least I have 3 days in between to recover, seriously!

Seriously Endure

So my youngest (Car) wanted to do this Girls on the Run program last Spring with some of her friends, but the times conflicted with dance class so she could not. And my oldest has always had this flat footed awkward kind of running stride - so my brilliant idea was to create our own Girls on the Run "GOTR" program over the summer and train for a 5K. My husband got wind of it and wanted to join in, so come mid-July (when school finally got out in NY) we entered family run time. Found an app that would safely train us to run and build endurance - I thought it was Couch to 5K (aka C25K) but I mistakenly downloaded the wrong one, but it really is the same thing - it's called 5K Runner. First run (which is really all walking) we discussed why we were running and what we wanted to accomplish within ourselves (very GOTR of me - right) Oh sorry - back up - the whole premise of GOTR (other than running) is building self -esteem. Hubs response - "I want to lose weight" My response "I want to do this as a family" Oldest (MK) "Nothing, you are making me do this" Car "I want to be faster when I play lacrosse" OK so that's something. Fast forward 9 1/2 weeks - this is AGONY, seriously. I have no idea what I was thinking. Most weeks, Car is running so slow hubs or I have to loop back around so we don't actually lose her. Not joking - 14 -15 minute mile pace. It.is.painful. And she whines a lot. And she needs water a lot (and she can't run and drink at the same time) But she can now "run" 35 minutes without stopping. MK has had a few meltdowns of her own - not being able to catch her breath or her knee hurts, but really has sort of just trooped right through it. And her stride is definitely better - still a bit odd - but it doesn't look painful anymore. We have not picked an actual race day yet (again dance conflicts - we need a Sunday morning race, not Saturday) so since we finished the 9 week app and school has resumed we are now running twice a week - 30-35 minutes each time to keep up our endurance until we actually race. All in all I am thrilled that I have been able to do it and running is the easiest it has ever been for me, I am considering continuing the app and trying my first 10K ever, we will see. The good is the time we have spent together, stretching and walking before and after we run, and singing our running theme song "Hollaback Girl" We change the sh*$ word to ship so it is completely 9 yr old appropriate now, especially as we scream it through the neighborhood (that's my ship, that's my ship. This ship is bananas b-a-n-a-n-a-s). The bad is the time we spend running and me "encouraging" them (er yelling). Endurance is a trait we now all carry and not necessarily the lung capacity version. We can endure one another through this, I think. Last night's mid - September 105 heat index run was a low point. Where did my cool crisp August evenings go? We need those back, our attitudes are bad enough. Seriously!

Seriously Chafed

So a friend asked if I wanted to try aerial yoga and I practically jumped at her I was so excited. As a former gymnast who thinks she is somewhat in shape (a little yoga, a little jogging) I thought this would be right up my alley - yoga upside down while supported, yes thank you! As my friends can attest I do like any opportunity to do a handstand or show you my 1992 floor routine (minus the tumbling - so it's really just a goofy leaping dance show), and I especially like to perform these numbers after a few cocktails. It doesn't always end well, but sometimes I seriously think I nailed it - like in the high 9's for scoring. So, back to aerial yoga on silks, OUTSIDE on a deck on a beautiful summer night - could it possibly get any better? There was a soft breeze, soft music and lovely instructor, a cute young couple and then my two nutsy friends and I. We hop into our "seats" and are swinging lightly in the breeze as we begin the practice - very quickly we move into some basic stretches and poses. Then we start flipping into and out of poses. This was way out of my comfort zone as I hadn't done any real flipping in at least 15 years. It did seem like I was going to nail my head on the ground as I dove forward but somehow I did not and was now in a very awkward forward bend with my legs bent like a frog and I felt my first sensation of chafing. The silk was rubbing against my feet and hips to a degree that was about unbearable but there was absolutely no way to get out of this position without actually landing on my head. So I had to pull myself back around and then climb up the silks (good evening biceps) until I was standing up on them and swaying. I glance back at my two friends - one is still upside down turning purple while trying to figure out how the devil to get out and the other was sitting on the ground about to throw up - there was NO disclosure about possible motion sickness.... So the class continued, minus one- I attempted every pose and aerial maneuver and was quite proud of myself for sticking with it. Did I love it? No, certainly not - was I challenged, yes definitely. My core was killing me the next day from all the balancing and pulling up to get out of "stunts". But what I walk away mostly with was the feeling of the silk chafing against my butt fat as it hung over the material when I was upside down. Can I get over that and try again? I am going to have to seriously think about it. Seriously.

Seriously Uncertain

I started a blog approximately 11 months ago. I wrote exactly one post and then backed away. I could blame it on the kids, the house, the husband, the dog, but really it's just me. I am seriously unmotivated. If you ask any of my friends what trait of mine they wished they had they would say that I am organized. I really do like check lists, grocery lists, meal lists, activity lists, you get the idea. But, when it comes to my own life and ambitions I am seriously lame. My youngest will be ten soon and I do realize most stay at homers with kids the same ages have eased back into some sort of employment.  I help out at the school,  I coach a "sport",  I help my kids with homework, I carpool to all the activities and I bake homemade cookies (of course, of course, of course, of course, of course) But trying to figure out what I actually want to do with my time that I am not with my children has been a bit tricky. I even got a puppy - but she just turned one and doesn't need me like she did. I have a lot of wants in this life and my husband has very recently started suggesting that if I really want it I should get a job. I realize he is right, but in reality I don't want to mess with this gig I got. I am pretty happy. I feel like I am doing exactly what I thought I would be doing as I near the big 4-0 (other than having created that critically acclaimed 30 minute comedy for NBC) I guess that's it. I thought I would be a writer and as you have witnessed I have written approximately 800 words in the past year. Maybe I should take a creative writing class at my local community college? But that would be me spending more money on me and not making any money for me.  And then there is all that damn guilt about all my wants vs needs - the same thing I lecture my tweenage girls about constantly. Even though I am doing what I thought I would be doing pertaining to my family life at this stage I guess I just thought it would be different and easier. I do wish their was a reset button in the sense of work experience and education choices as the tech/network support job I excelled at in 1999 does not equate to any money now. And I don't want to get a job just to get a job, (no retail, no teacher's aide, no waitressing) I want to find something I actually enjoy and make money doing that. If I have to mess with this pretty damn good life, than it better be worth it. I'll take suggestions. And don't say go get a Master's in Ed to teach - I live in NY and school budgets aren't passing - they would have to hire back all the teachers they let go before they start hiring new ones. But, I do love a good party - do you think a small upstate country town that's in a severe recession is in need of a party planner? Seriously...

Seriously Asleep

The other night I had just fallen soundly asleep when I hear a, “Heather, you awake?” from the bathroom. I spring out of bed, “yup, “ I yell as I rub my eyes and stumble towards the light. 

What’s going through my head in the 5 seconds it takes me to maneuver through this narrow, confined space?  A weird bug (but why wouldn’t he just kill it), a feminine product not disposed of properly (why harp on that at this hour, just flush it) One of the kids? (but he’s in our bathroom not in the hall) A phone call? Hmmm... 

I look up and he is standing in the full light looking at me with his white under-shirt pulled up to his shoulders.  “Look at this, ” he says, pointing at his chest.  As my eyes adjust to the bright fluorescent of the annoying energy saver light bulbs I say, “You have hair growing out of your nipple?” Response: “No, the rash, do you see the rash?” I turn as I start chuckling and he says, “no, seriously, you dim-wit do you see this rash” I examine the rash, which is in fact covering his chest, torso and back and tell him to take some Benadryl.  I got back in bed but couldn’t stop laughing for a good 20 minutes.   

We’ve been married for 15 years and I just now noticed the nipple hair? Seriously.